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Milblogging.com's goal is to create the best directory of blogs that make up the Military Blogosphere. Learn more about the selected military blog by reviewing the information below.

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Submitted By:

Date Submitted:

13 Dec 2007

Claimed By:

Claimed On:

24 Jan 2008

Website URL:

http://snarkynavywife.blogspot.com

Title:

Just Another Snarky Navy Wife

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Anchored Away

Country:

United States

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English

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U.S. Military (Spouse)
Visit SpouseBUZZ.com to learn more about military spouses

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Female

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5

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The [mostly snarky] bitchery of a lefty Pagan milspouse who doesn't like to pull her punches.

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Preview Last 5 Entries:

Title:	On Monterey's exchanges and the clusterfuck that is AAFES...
Posted On:	September 2, 2010, 08:14 AM
Listing Detail	Monterey doesn't have the best on-base opportunities. There are three "bases" in this tiny area - the Presidio, NPS, and the no-longer-a-base-but-still-populated-by-militariness Ft Ord. Presidio is where you go for pediatrics and the half-stocked pharmacy that probably won't carry what you need but will tell you with a very friendly smile when they can't fill your $180-copay prescription. NPS has a very small Navy-emphasized exchange with a huge alcohol section (shocker), some food and beverage aisles, a tiny electronics department, a huge clothing section filled with a whole lotta nothing, and some housewares and books and gifty shit. Ord is where you go for the commissary and the exchange, such as they are. The commissary, unfortunately, is one of the worst managed I've ever seen. It's so common to hit the store four times in two weeks and never once see product on the bread shelves. They run out of stuff all the time. Creamer? Gone. Bread? Looks like looters hit it. Produce options? Pretty fucking lackluster, and the bananas are usually either bright green or gone. Last year, I kept waiting for them to carry some canned pumpkin for my (omnomnompumpkin) fall baking, but they only kept room on the shelves for about six of the double-sized cans, and I ended up lucking out one time and scoring two cans...two weeks after Thanksgiving. But management doesn't just fall down on what they carry and how much. Yesterday, I was in the self-check aisle for about fifteen minutes between waiting for a free checkstand and waiting for the poor overworked employee to run around unfreezing the piece of shit checkstands that constantly require employee intervention. In that fifteen minutes, I watched the poor woman call out three times on the PA system that she needed a grocer in self-check for a price check. Nobody came, including the manager. The issues with the commissary are so severe that I'd stop shopping there altogether if it weren't for the outrageous 9.8something% tax and outrageous California pricing on grocery items. Recently, I blogged about the TV that melted on us, but I didn't tell you what I learned about the AAFES system. I don't know if the NEX system is the same way - I imagine it must be, but I've never run into massive trouble with NEX like I have AAFES, so I haven't had the chance to learn their processes. Let me tell you what I learned... When our TV melted, we headed to Ord's exchange. We'd considered NEX, but the options at Ord are much better in the technology department. It's a little bit bigger, you see, but bigger enough to have more offerings. First we went to Best Buy to check on what was out there in the real world, though. What we found at the PX was pretty awesome - exactly the TV we wanted, only bigger. The price was a tiny bit higher than Best Buy's, but the tax free part made it a better purchase through AAFES. We asked about a smaller version and were told they were sold out, but that the big-ass TV was identical to the smaller one we wanted, size aside. So we reluctantly agreed to get the big-ass TV. We bought it. We even relented on our anti-credit card stance and got a fucking exchange credit card to save another 10% (it's a big fucking TV, y'all). We got out to the loading dock to pick up the TV and were met by a man who seemed like the electronics manager. He told us the entire palette of big-ass TVs had cracked screens. The only alternative was the huge-ass five-inches-bigger-than-any-human-really-needs version. We asked how long it would take for the next shipment of big-ass TVs and were given what in Bahrain would have been "inshallah." Which basically means maybe next month, maybe never.... We asked if the NEX might have a TV in a size we wanted, and we were told that they only carry the smaller TV, not one we're looking for. This, it turns out, was untrue. It was getting time to pick up the sprogs from their after care, so we impulsively decided to upgrade to the huge-ass TV. YodaMan went inside to take care of the switcheroo, and we loaded the OMG HOW FUCKING BIG DOES A TV NEED TO BE box into our soccer-mom-mobile. Got home, cracked the box open, and saw evidence that the TV had been returned. And there were vital components missing. We couldn't even turn it on. YodaMan called the exchange since they were supposed to be open another fifteen minutes. The phone went straight to an answering machine that hung up on him. Ord is far enough away, and Hwy 1 congests enough at that time of day to make the drive a solid twenty or thirty minutes. Normally it would only be ten or fifteen, but we were stuck. Next day, we took the TV back to the PX and explained what had happened. We asked how long it would take to get another TV since they had none in stock. Here's where the shocking answer comes in. They don't have the first clue. Since AAFES (and probably NEX) gets its better prices by lucking out on product, they have no idea what they're going to get. They don't actually order their stock - it's sent to them by headquarters. So when they get an entire palette of broken electronics, there's nothing they can do but contact other exchanges and try to get a new one shipped there. Here's how they do that: Ord e-mails kinda-nearby exchanges with their request. Other exchange writes the details on a fucking sticky pad. Other exchange toodles into their stock room. Other exchange looks through piles for something matching what's on the sticky pad. Other exchange toodles back to the computer. Other exchange e-mails Ord with a response: yes we have it or no we don't. Then begins a whole new process to obtain the product. Why all the toodling? Why the combing through the stock room? Why e-mail anyone at all? Because there's no stock database. Not in the store, not in a state, not in a district, not in the country. We're in the fucking 21st century, and the highest technology used to account for stock is fucking e-mail. Does this strike you as hilariously appropriate but nonetheless shocking? When an area is stuck with fuckstick management decisions, uninformed customer service, a stunning lack of technology, and only a teensy system to feed a rather significant military population, what does that lead to? Each shopping trip is like walking into the apocalypse. It's scary, it's lonely, and if you make it out alive, you'll probably have bite marks.

Title:	Religion and Medals: It's motherfucking fiction, bitches
Posted On:	August 31, 2010, 01:02 AM
Listing Detail	Religion is tough. It's an individual choice whether to be spiritual at all, much less religious. Then you have to decide which religion is right for you if any. I do believe, absolutely, that walking your path changes you, but I believe even more absolutely that those changes become obvious to the outside world. You might not be "on" 24/7, but you make different choices, you come to different decisions, and hopefully you're a better person with more investment in the world community. Hopefully. I know some religions are much more about feeding the "me me me" generation, and it sure is easy when you can declare that your preacher said you can sin all day so long as you are a True Believer. I'm sure the iPhone generation loves that as much as my microwave generation did. Going to hell? Press the I Believe button and be instantly transported to heaven!! And there are plenty of Christian churches I've encountered in my life that tell you just that. You should strive to be a good person, but if you're just a dickbag and can't help it, ask for forgiveness. It's always on tap. And here's the wacky part. I might not get it, but I respect it. That's your path, that's what you need to feed your soul, that's how you're going to learn and grow in this lifetime to walk one step closer in the next? Awesome. Get your bad dickbag self on. What I have a hard time dealing with is hypocrites, and if you've been a dickbag once in spite of your religion (while not playing the Forgiveness Is On Tap card), I just don't trust your religious intentions. And that's a large part of my problem with Glenn Beck's masturbatory theater this past weekend. I read the transcript of Beck's rally recap and was stunned by how often Glenn Beck referred to himself in the third person. It rather reminded me of an experience in high school, when I was playing all my cards to get into the Naval Academy (thank gods I'm a fucking midget and had to go up for a height waiver - dodged that bullet). I was on my congressman's "teen advisory committee" or some bullshit thing. We basically met twice in a year and listened to the good congressman and his guest speaker yammer at us for a while. Our first meeting's speaker was George Foreman. Mind you, this was 1991, before George Foreman re-entered popular culture post-boxing or whatever the fuck he did. During George Foreman's long-ass talk, George Foreman used his own fucking name, often in third person, a hundred fucking times. I'm not kidding. He'd just built some youth center in Houston, which had a name that went something like this: The George Foreman Youth Sports Center and Center For Kids Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too. I'm not fucking kidding, y'all. George Foreman loved George Foreman's name. He also loved his youth center's name, as every time he referenced it, he called it by it's entire fucking name, including the part that was George Foreman. The dude I carpooled with to this fine event, a nice guy who was seriously made for the Navy (he did go to the USNA, bless his sweet little soul) with a stick up his ass only slightly larger than my own, also snarked on George Foreman and George Foreman's penchant for repeating George Foreman's name at every opportunity. The snarking from this guy? Comedy gold. But I digress. I thought about George Foreman as I read Glenn Beck's sweet reminiscence of his very public self-love and ejaculations. I also thought that a man who claims to be sooooo religious and wants the country to go back to god (Yahweh, I assume? not sure whose god, but apparently there's just the one he's aiming us for) was sure full of hate. The hate's not new. He's a sexist and a hateful douchenozzle, of course, even admitting in an interview on 20/20 that the only reason he became a Mormon was to get into his "hot" wife's little Mormon panties. A man so full of loathing that he once - as a personal vendetta against someone with better radio ratings - called his nemesis's wife on the air and mocked her for having just endured a miscarriage. A guy who claims to be a Christian and yet derides the idea of social justice and believes that poor people are poor because of a bad work ethic. So when a guy gets up in front of a large crowd and plays the I'm-A-Good-Christian card, then whacks off about it the next day with all his faux-humility out there with the repetitions of his name and how awesome he is, I don't buy it. On top of that, he pissed me off with his bullshit before he ever stepped foot on the Mall in DC. He pissed me off when he lied regarding the Badge of Merit he wanted to resurrect and the Purple Heart. And in his lying, he also made disgraceful statements about those who have been awarded the Purple Heart: 's right. He's interested in honoring integrity and those folks who really stick their necks out. Not just because they got shot. Because any asshole in Afghanistan can take a bullet, and who the fuck knows what he was doing before an insurgent blew a hole through his intestines. He could have been smoking a crack pipe! Yeah! And I bet that means he was a progressive!! Yeah! Never mind the history diddle Beck did here, either. Never mind the huge progressive conspiracy that turned the Badge of Merit into a Purple Heart (which, as I've heard, was a military request, not a political movement of any flavor). Never mind fact - we have fiction! That's something Beck and I have in common - we're fiction whores. The difference is my kind comes with a label that clearly says MOTHERFUCKING FICTION, BITCHES on the spine. His kind comes with a veneer of truthiness and a metric smeg-ton of hatred and vitriol, which I'm pretty sure peace-loving baby Jesus in his heavenly manger would frown upon. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if baby Jesus has been crying for years now from the bullshit Beck declares in the name of Christian lurve and integrity. I bet it breaks his poor little baby-god heart that a whole fucking rally was dedicated to him, preceded by lies and hate, and capped with a sweet self-love-making session on the air. Yeah, let's get this country on the path back to GAWD, and let's make sure we do it with a badge of lies awarded for integrity, discounted heroism, and a single religion's view to to bind us all together. Exactly what the founding fathers were thinking about when they drafted the Constitution and the Bill of Rights. The hypocrisy is unbearable, but the hatred is worse. And now I've exhausted myself trying not to drop every creative swear word I know and love into this post. Because that smegbucket fuckburger isn't worth all my pretty profanities. Not even close.

Title:	Navi Pr0n
Posted On:	August 28, 2010, 08:48 AM
Listing Detail	I get a kick out of looking at the keywords and keyword phrases that bring visitors to this site. Lately, I've seen an increase in people coming here looking to find Navi porn. First, how awesome is it that Google will offer up Navy instead of Navi? Second, how awesome is it that Google sees fit to offer my site as a fine example of Navy porn? Third, how delightful is it that people see the title of the site, see bits of phrases containing no Navi but lots of Navy and perhaps some pr0n and still come here anyway? Score, my bitches! Score. Of course, the next question that arises is what the hell is Navi porn, and how hilarious is it. Fear not, dear reader. I have friends who know about Navi porn, and they shared with me the fact that Hustler is doing a 3-D porn flick based on Avatar. It's supposed to be a parody, but I'm guessing there won't be much intentionally funny if yanno what I mean. Oh, and I have a link! To Navi pr0n! Well, not the pr0n but to an article about the pr0n that includes the question how could navi pr0n possibly be titillating when they don't have mammalian sex organs? Quite so! Enjoy the pr0n article, and have a great weekend. Because I'm a-storing up to rant my ass off about Herr Glenn Beck. Yes indeedy.

Title:	Jai Ma!
Posted On:	August 27, 2010, 10:48 AM
Listing Detail	In the great quest to find a spiritual outlet each time we PCS, I often end up driving a good distance to see what's what in the area. Since coming to Monterey, most of my driving has been to the local UU church, but last fall I had the opportunity to drive into San Francisco and take part in a Kali Puja put on by Sharanya. It was incredible. Long, intense, and so beautiful. And look! Pictures from the puja! In which I appear.... Look! It's me, be all devotional instead of snarky and bitchy. But wait. Which one was me? Hmmm. I'm delighted I had the opportunity to attend the puja last year. I hope I can do it again this year, and that I have similar opportunities at our next home. This year will be the last one I can attend. :( (see the Navy give me a sad? mean old navy.)

Title:	Is the TV supposed to smell like that?
Posted On:	August 26, 2010, 09:13 AM
Listing Detail	Our TV blew up. Actually, it melted. We bought an Oh My Fucking Gods huge-ass Sony TV when we got back to the States after the hellish two years in Bahrain. We promised ourselves the whole time we were there that when we were back "home," we'd take the money we'd saved up over there and sink some of it into a nice new television. And it was HUGE. Gargantuan. A 50-inch screen. I lurved it with all my little commercial-whore heart. About two years ago, when the TV was four years old, it suddenly went fritzy on me. I googled the issue and saw that it was likely a burned out lamp (it's a rear projection TV - the LCDs were just too expensive for us at the time when we bought). Not too shabby, the lamp lasting as long as it did, even if it had gotten dark lately so that we had some trouble seeing action during nighttime scenes. Naturally, this occurred during a deployment. Of course, right? So I ordered a new lamp, waited patiently for its arrival, got on a stool and maneuvered the TV to pop open the front (we had it up on a shelf), and replaced the lamp. All was fine. The TV revived, and we enjoyed a much brighter screen than we'd seen in probably a year at that point. Around that time, I was also watching much less TV since I was armpit-deep in school. We still don't watch a whole lot of TV. It's rare we get in more than, say, an hour a day if we turn it on at all. Weekends are different - we put on movies and watch news shows, catch up on anything Tivo grabbed for us, etc. So my mother just left from a week-long, wonderful visit (excepting her preference for Fox News, which she would turn the TV to by default). I decided to sit down and watch an episode of Arrested Development while I ate lunch, so I turned the TV on, flipped to Netflix, and ploop. TV screen went blank. This happens sometimes - it just means we have to reboot the TV from the wall plug. Unplug, replug, turn the TV on, and voila. There was the screen...and then it faded to black. That time, I couldn't get it back on. I e-mailed the husband at school (thanking the gods this time he's not deployed for this fiasco) and told him I thought the TV lamp might be gone, except it was doing something strange this time. It wasn't like two years ago. Not at all. We googled and found that the lamp was the likely culprit, though. But before husband decided to order a new one, I suggested we pop open the front and check the lamp. After all, this one was only two years old and hadn't gotten a third of the action the previous lamp did in its first two years of use. And what do you know? The lamp was just fine. Bright, clean, and clear on the inside, everything perfectly affixed as it should be. Except that the entire housing for the lamp was melted. There was melted plastic that had cooled to the side of the lamp, and we actually had to break the housing a bit to get the lamp out because it had warped pretty badly. I tried to slide the lamp back in, but it wouldn't go. So we googled some more, saw the outrageous price to have the TV fixed (we could buy a new one for less), and opted to call this one a bad investment. Here are some luverly pictures that show why I no longer have a hard-on for Sony products. Apparently this is a known issue with this television, but their customer service folks have told others that it's not a fire hazard and not their problem. I beg to differ. Note the melty casing, all brown and broken and delicious. Note the melty plastic, all brown and hardened and pathetic.Here's some melty brown plastic where it cooled and dried and hardened as it dripped down to pool in front of the lamp. But, you know, this isn't a fire hazard or really dangerous at all. Not even if this hot-ass plastic drips right out of the TV and onto carpet or papers or pets or sprogs. Nope. Not dangerous, and not Sony's problem. At least, according to a slew of people who encountered this problem (some within two years of purchase) and called Sony to get it fixed. We didn't even bother, we were so disgusted by the whole thing. We're well out of warranty range at this point. We bought a new TV yesterday. Needless to say, it's not a Sony. And now, for your viewing pleasure (and to see what I fully intend to watch on my new TV this fall), the preview we saw at Comic-Con (wutwut) for the TV adaptation of The Walking Dead (the comics are recommended for sure): logger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/8774672936976055299-9027970231779046710?l=snarkynavywife.blogspot.com' alt='' />

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